Called to the Crazy

On January 1, 2014, we made a decision that undoubtedly had some of our friends and family questioning our sanity. Maybe we even questioned our own sanity. On that day, we invited a teenage girl-- a complete stranger-- to come and live with us and our 3 young children.

We were heading back from our annual Christmas road trip. It was late at night and I was surfing Facebook, killing time on the 15 hour car ride, when I noticed a post that was "shared" by a lady I had met at a neighborhood function that fall. The message was simple: Was there anyone out there who had a room to spare so a teenage girl could finish out high school that spring?

Normally, I don't even take the time to read shared posts, especially posts shared by people I hardly know. But this caught my eye. I read it. I read it again. I read it a third time. And God dropped in my heart: You are the one.

What?! You must be crazy, God. I have THREE young children. We homeschool! My husband travels all the time. I don't know anything about teenagers except I was one and I know I wasn't fun for my mom at that time. I could name a hundred other people that would be better suited for taking in a teenager- people closer to that season of life, with some experience. This wasn't even safe right? There were obviously circumstances surrounding this-- complicated ones.

You are the one.

As I read and reread that message and God continued to lay on my heart the complete certainty that this was His plan for us, I couldn't help but think, "Okay, sure...But I'm going to have to run it by my husband and there is no way he's going to go for this. It's CRAZY!" Who really asks their husband, "Hey honey, how about a stranger coming to live with us for 6 months? What do you think??"

I should have known that would not get me out of this. He just nodded his head slowly and said, "Yes. Sure. We have a room. If this is what God's calling us to do, then we're going to be obedient. We're going to make calls, learn more about the situation, meet her, and keep seeing if we have God's peace about it."

And before you start saying, "Oh, you guys are such good people!" Let me stop you right there. We are not. We are broken sinners, saved only by God's infinite grace and mercy. I am selfish. I like my alone time. I like my clean house. I like things I can control. I would really like to say that I would have done this because I have a good heart, but I cannot. God spoke to me-- a very imperfect person-- to do this crazy thing. The only thing I did "right" was obey, but even then, it was kicking and screaming and doubting and with a bad attitude at times.

I went to bed that night and lay awake thinking-- where was this girl now? What was the situation? I resigned myself to this: God, if you REALLY want me to do this, continue to open doors and we will be obedient.

The next day, I made a phone call and spoke at length with the wonderful lady who was involved and had known her for a while. She was open and honest. We continued to pray. We agreed to meet her for an "interview" at a local coffee shop. After all, if she wasn't willing to abide by the rules we laid down, this wasn't going to work anyway. I consulted our pastors. We came up with our rules. We didn't even know what were appropriate rules for teenagers, but we came up with what we could.

My heart was pounding out of my chest when we pulled up at the coffee shop. Glancing around, I saw her sitting at the table. She greeted us politely and formally. She smiled at our daughter, who was 9 months old at the time. We began to talk. I'm sure part of her had to be wondering who these crazy people were that didn't even know her, but were inviting her to come live with them. She asked questions. We asked questions. And in a few hours, it was done. She would come to finish out her high school year with our family.

She moved in the very next day. Our kids were wild. To them, this sounded like a never-ending slumber party and that would be great fun! I'm sure the second she walked in and was surrounded by toys and noise and little kids running around, part of her wanted to run. But she didn't. And our journey began.

We started getting to know each other and our conversations often lasted until late into the night. She began to open up and we shared openly and honestly. She asked questions about faith. We answered as honestly as we could, knowing God would do the real work, but I still felt so terribly inadequate. After all, I was not quite a friend and not quite a parent. We navigated a muddled road somewhere in-between and among all those paths. The whole thing was a messy, complicated, emotional mess. But guess what? God's word says He can work through all things--even our messes.

And He did. Almost a month later, she let us know that she had made the decision to completely give her life over to God. She understood that God had sent his son, Jesus, to the earth to die for her sins. She understood and accepted His complete forgiveness, knowing that this meant her sins were forgiven and forgotten. She let go of all her deep hurt, shame, guilt, bitterness, regret. She had had to walk through things that were unimaginable to me, but she was ready to give it all over to God. She knew becoming a Christ-follower would mean radical life transformation. And it was.

We began to see real joy in her. Real peace. It wasn't always an easy road. God never promises us that. But He does promise that as we go through trials, He will not leave us. She was a new person.

She lived with us until the following July. 7 months in total. There's so much I could say about our journey, but the main thing is this: Our family was immeasurably blessed by this young lady. As her faith grew, our faith grew. We have been so privileged to walk with her through proms, graduation, financial aid and the college journey, relationships, work, school, and faith. Our home was full of crazy teenagers and slumber parties for a short season. We had a new norm and it was fun. Most of all, God receives all the glory because He did what only He can do.

Two weeks ago, we had to say a temporary goodbye to her as she moved to another state. A new physical beginning seems entirely appropriate in this new season of life:

"Do not call to mind the former things, Or ponder things of the past. 19"Behold, I will do something new, Now it will spring forth; Will you not be aware of it? I will even make a roadway in the wilderness, Rivers in the desert.…" Isaiah 43:18-19

To this precious young lady, who I know will read this because I asked her permission before even writing it- You are treasured. You have taught us that we can love someone who is not our own biological child as deeply as our own. We are so proud of you for your continued journey as a Christ follower. We know God will continue to do a "new" thing in you. We are always praying for you and especially now as you forge a new path in a new place.

To everyone else reading this, thank you for allowing me to share with you an important part of our lives. God may not call you to take in a teenager, but if you are following Him, He will call you to do something "crazy." Something entirely out of your comfort zone. You see, God does not call us to lead ordinary lives. I don't believe His plan is for us to sit back, be comfortable, and live the "American dream." And that's what I was--comfortable and complacent--until God totally rocked my world one day.

I challenge myself continually with the same question I challenge you-- what will you do when God calls you to do the crazy, the uncomfortable, the unfamiliar?...